Bonus #1 - Feminine Submission

Anastasia meets Christian. Christian at some point feels comfortable enough to confide in Ana that he is into BDSM play.
 Emily Anne
Updated: January 8, 2020

Feminine Submission

In this video I'm going to cover feminine submission and the principals in this video can apply to any gender but we're dealing with feminine submission in the sense of feminine energy so in terms of female body people but it can apply to any gender submission and one of the reasons why I am a submissive is that there's this yummy sort of release of the oars so that I don't have to roll my own boat kind of a feeling that happens in a Dom sub scenario and especially in a Dom sub scene well the feminine submission are to release and let go and allow someone else to have now I like to talk about the difference between power and control a submissive the one who has the power in the Dom something amick I know it seems like it's the opposite of people but it's a it's a miss standing of the Dom sub relationship when people think OU know the dumb is the one who has the power but really any power that the dominant has is given to him or her or they buy the submissive so in that sense the submissive is the one with the power because the submissive is giving permission the dominant to lead so that's how it's different than control the dominant is in control of the session ended the relationship in general but the submissive has the power at any time to take away permission and give the boundaries of permission me to submit I talked about this just a minute ago really to me it's the idea that you let go of control and allow someone else to control places that are being made so it's almost like if you believe in God or the universe is her like trusting the universe and letting go of the oars and letting the universe lead you that's why I tend to think of it as a feminine energy because we really are more about them water so in that sense you're just allowing the forces to take you the relationship to the masculine again this isn't a gender concept it is an energy concept so familiar with yin and yang the dumps of relationship is very much like the yin and the Yang there's a polarity that's created when one person is more in their masculine energy directed logical in control then the other person is submissive feminine energy more which is again in allowing receptive state okay the Cornerstone of a healthy Dom sub Dynamic is consent this segment and powered consent because sometimes we think of consent in very general terms and we don't realize that consent has to come from an inner knowing so sometimes we might not know what we like or don't like until we try it but we have to have an ongoing relationship with consent in the dumps of dynamic the entire time beginning middle end continuing at any point so I'm going to go over consent just in general terms in this video and go over them in a in a broader sense in a different video I have the power of the dog has the control whatever does Anna seen or in a dynamic is permission-based so it's and it's something that the sub seeds control and ultimately wants so it's important to set boundaries and the way you do that is again you there's that the the Kink list and some snares that you can go through and talk to your dominant about what things you are willing to try or not willing to try physical boundaries emotional boundaries so for example of physical boundary would be you might not want a certain type of impact play like for instance I generally give my dominance the Q that they're not allowed to slap my face too hard cuz I don't want to get marked but but they can slap it lightly for example or you might just you know have an issue with one area of your body just don't like to be touched that's a physical boundary foundry could be you don't like certain you to be called certain names you you don't want the dominant to degrade you or humiliate you and that's that's an emotional boundary are mental andre be here so consent really comes from within and it but it needs to be communicated without so dynamic is really communication on steroids and really until you develop a rapport and a flowing relationship with your dominant it's me nikishin over a lot of details and feelings is required just keep in mind that just because you can send to something initially doesn't mean you don't have the power to change your mind at any time and that's the importance of the safe word seen you want to before the scene you want to communicate so that once you're in the scene you can really let go and let things happen and flow up until you know there's something that you don't like or you can't handle or you you know no longer want to give consent for red is usually a good safe word that's the one I like to use some people like to use pineapple or things that really are a little sillier I personally don't like that because that's too many syllables and I like to be able to say that's a word really fast in case you know I need to get ahead of some of the action if it's impact play for example so and red means full stop you can also have gradations of the safe word including you know some people use sometimes people use green to say that the dominant can continue but anyway this all has to do with empowered consent in this sense of like really trust yourself if you're a submissive sort of have a handle on your what's going on inside you at all times in your dominant really should be paying attention that's partly why the communication is important they should really know what you like and don't like before anything happens and their job is to actually protect you so but you still have to take responsibility for your own okay so I like to talk about the benefits of submission I mean to me has changed my life and BDSM has changed my life one of the reasons why is that it's allowed me to balance my masculine and feminine feminine energy I am what I would consider an alpha sub which means I'm Alpha and a leader in life and a submissive General in the bedroom I mean I'm also a switch but I'm more submissive then dominant in the bedroom so about submitting in the bedroom or submitting to a dominant is that I can shut my I can I'm using my masculine a lot in day-to-day life and business others and so when I get to submit it's a treat and it's it helps me slip into my feminine energy more and that polarity helps me slip into that feminine energy more and it balances out my life and my energies and it just makes me feel so much younger than I was before where do I get to enter this metaphor for Life idea is like when you're in your feminine and you're submitting it's similar to just sort of like letting the universe take you where it wants to take you and trusting that you will get to your destination you know the the dumps of dynamic requires a tremendous amount of Trust on both sides but from the submissive in particular you're handing over the reins to someone so you have to be able to trust them she is a really powerful energy we think you know in terms of the patriarchy is sort of like we think of the power is being a masculine thing but that's not true there's power in both the masculine and feminine and feminine power comes from being in the feminine flow and tapping into intuition creativity and those sorts of things and then I want to talk about the benefit of bonding so I think a lot of bonding happens in the dumps of dynamic because really you know when someone trust you when when a dominant feel that trust and is allowed to be in control and benefit the dumps of dynamic because obviously this submissive is getting a benefit and the dominant there's a bond that occurs and it can be a very deep bond so it's something that is are you people explored this dynamic okay the basic I'm just going to go over just really quickly basic rules for first of Memphis we talked about boundary setting when you're sometimes I get the question hey how do I set a boundary when I don't even know what I might like because I haven't tried it yet well okay so that's why you talk about options ahead of time and use the king class and you go over it with your dominant and it has to be this is the second Point how to communicate with a dominant about what's going to happen in a scene or a session has to occur prior to the scene and then communication continues through the scene that's where the negotiation process comes into play and that's how you set your boundaries prior to place like you station but it's really about okay this is what I want this is what you want how do we come together and what are the boundaries so that within what I want you have free rein so communicate with your dominant you know and it's helpful to sort of have when there are any sticky issues I like to call it truth with tax so you know don't you know it's not a time for emotions or whatever but if there are areas that you're very sensitive about that you might have had some drama in the past you need to let your dominant know to stay away from those areas and like the risks of you no bumping up against things that might not feel good to you want to talk about rules for brats okay I brought is usually a submissive who doesn't like to submit who typically upfront ordering it it is sort of like a way to test the dominant sometimes and it's fun and it's a way to ramp up the dominant so to make them more and one rule I would say for brats is that make sure that your dominant knows that your behavior is actually part of the bratty side and also know the limits of your dominant because sometimes I can be knowing if someone's body too long because if they never submit you know they never really submit and you have to physically overpower them some dominant it's not as much fun I find and it might be tomorrow I think it just depends on the type of dog and you have to negotiate that as well as a big topic but I'll just give a couple pointers here first of all you want to try and if you're new to this you want to try and small steps like you know one example is you know what am I and I was never really into it and I was never really into it next session next session but it wasn't completely negative on it I completely negative on it I just didn't see the I didn't I didn't you know it wasn't something really called me but he felt really called me but he felt really strongly about it boundaries and boundaries and we ended up try mission and it went really well really enjoyed it and really enjoyed it and I gay in that scenario sort of in order to please sort of in order to please the dominant but I am benefit of it because I benefit of it because I I how much it how much it please him and I actually tried something I actually tried something new that so so this is one short example you can just resting just like just trusting just like deciding that you're going to and and I'm going with it okay okay I'm going to talk about how to do you know that's behavior on here don't be a passive aggressive behavior on here don't be a passive aggressive it shows hand and you know it's something you don't like have a discussion with the sessions so that the sessions so that they don't do it again don't hold grudges because don't hold grudges because part of part of this is knowing what your knowing what your boundaries are go to express yourself go to express yourself and what they don't want to get they don't want to get bitten find later on find later on I think doing the right thing doing the right thing and then finding out that you holding a grudge holding a grudge holding a grudge holding a grudge and holding a grudge I don't criticize here now I don't criticize here now what that means you that doesn't mean you you that doesn't mean you don't say I didn't like that or hey satyr hey I don't like daughter hey I don't like that as much as you know go over after you know you can use but don't constantly nitpick or criticize or say things that would undermine the dumbs confidence search up conversations though something's bothering you you've got to bring it up don't be passive aggressive we are already covered that don't allow any dominant to overstep your boundaries this is really important you do some people get confused you know about what add-on it can and can't do and people don't listen to their gut they think they're supposed to do everything like they literally can't ever say no and that's not the case so if something is really bothering you if if if the Donna is starting to overstep you got to put your foot down you have to say the safe word at the stop it don't try and operate without a safe word some submissives you know 2 I think they're slaves which is a different type of submissive but they want to have this feeling that the sky's the limit and you know they're just going to submit all the way and it gives them a sense of danger and they don't want to have the opportunity to have safer I would highly recommend do not do that I don't think it's safe I don't think it's part of safety to some play so you have to have a safe word and that has to be agreed on before you do any bdsn play and don't ignore your gut that's the most important thing you have it that's the basics of feminine submission 

This is for the truly kinky

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